It's not the job of a 4 or 5-year old child to help an adult with grown-up issues.
A child should not have to be concerned about how his mother is going to stretch her paycheck to pay the bills or buy clothes or birthday or Christmas presents. A child should not have to be concerned about how his mother feels about her in-laws. A child should not have to be concerned about the relationship his mother has with his father. A child should not have to be concerned about his mother's relationships with her sister, her friends or neighbors. A child should not have to be concerned about how to change his baby sister's diapers, or feed her or himself. A child should not have to be concerned about making sure that when the little hand is on 7 and the big hand is on 12 that he should go to bed. A child should not have to be concerned about babysitting his sister and himself.
What you will do is raise a fragile child who will worry about things children should not be worried about. You will create a child who is overly concerned, fearful and yet protective of his mother; a boy that is focused on doing and saying anything he thinks will make her happy or put her at ease which is a difficult task.
My sister had no idea why I didn't get any christmas presents while growing up. It's because I knew my mother could not afford presents for the both of us so I asked that she not buy me anything. I was 6.
A child should not be concerned with the thought that his purpose in life is to make sure he does or says anything possible that would make his mother happy.
A child should have zero jobs. Zero concerns. A child should be a child.
I was never a child.
I'm 59 years old, and people wonder why I behave the way I do, towards my mother, my sister, and towards women in general.
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