11 October 2010

Is any one among you suffering? Let him pray. Is any cheerful? Let him sing praise.
--James 5:13

i understand prayer as much as i understand love, which is nothing. i feel that to learn what and how one loves i have to go and learn so much of life- for everything it seems is an expression of love from one source or another. and prayer is an earmark of my journey. some of my earliest memories are of my sister and myself, talking about and to God as children.

when i was in high school and began to rediscover the existence that all of life i perceive and even that which is beyond is One- i recall my return to prayer being an allowance of hope. that if God does exist, than my prayer is this...and may it reach your ears.
shortly after i remember being at Thursday night bible study at the Rose Of Sharon COGIC, in Racine Wisconsin, where the leader said- everyone must share their prayer request because everyone needs prayer. i recall praying with someone who was battling darkened depths and asking for God to rescue him from that pit. i can trace the rollercoaster of my faith journey by how much I’m willing to surrender in prayer.
but what is the purpose of prayer? i really struggled to grasp why if it was so important there was no formal structure and no clear outline. why my prayers could be unlimited and i had the promise that God heard all of it. why praying to Him is a service, when to me it’s a listing of all my requests and my petitions to win over the Omnipotent Creator to my way.
and anyone who's taken part in Evangelical Christianity for at least a bit of time has learned that the purpose of prayer is to change our hearts, not His. but i can’t just elect to work on my heart when it’s convenient or when it fits into my schedule. prayer is still really fuzzy in my mind and really complex. but what's sunk in as of late is this: prayer is like the classroom for working on my soul and my spirit. we hash things out there, and that it’s really beneficial for me to try to be silent and still at least for a handful of moments a day. prayer is where we turn to elevate our souls to our spiritual level. prayer is where i'm to turn to in every emotion and every circumstance-- and thru this lens i will begin to see the greater reality in all of living.

4 comments:

Val said...

"...i recall my return to prayer being an allowance of hope."

That resonates with me.

Daij said...

Thanks !

Don said...

I never knew that prayer was to change our hearts. Thanks for sharing. I too pray without fail, not knowing the outcome but just wanting to feel in my heart that the spirit of God hears me, and is near.

Daij said...

I feel exactly the same, Don. On my way to work, I have my conversations with God, first thanking Him for all he's done for me, family and friends, and for what I need to have done, and for what He's most likely working on, since He knows our needs before we even know we need them.